Staccato

Beautiful soul. Hurt soul. Aching soul.

I hurt you, you and you. I regret...none.

Choose, you need to choose.

Decide, you need to decide. 

No decision is a decision. 

Why? No answer.

Time. 

More time. 

No extra time. 

How much time?

Unknown. Unknown.

Secret. No, it is not. 

Ashamed. No I am not.  

Lies. No it is not. 

What is better, lies or honesty? 

No difference. Exact same.

Can't handle anyway.

Choice and consequence. 

You choose, you pay. 

You don't choose, you pay. 

You play, you win...or lose. 

Enjoy. Live. Breath. Breath. Cry. 

Stop! Stop!

You. You. 

Imperfect. I do what I can do. 

This is me. This is you. 

You do what you can do. You too.

Imperfect. Perfect. Imperfect. 

Perfect in my imperfects. 

Fool. Cruel. Love, pure. Different. 

Love me different. 

Doesn't matter. 

Silence what matters. 

Perfectionist. Not. 

Suffer a bit. Ok. Why not? 

Suffer.

Happy. Sad. Happy. Moody. 

Perfectly happy. 

Damn angry. Sad. Sad. 

Moody. Down. Up. 

Up and down. 

Roller Coaster.

Adrenaline, fear. 

Punch in the face. 

Why? 

Broken. Broken.

Wine. The color, wine. 

Colors. Honey. Light. Dark. No.

Add colors. More colors. 

Smile. Perfect. That is perfect.

You. Be who you are. 

This is who you are. 

Disturbed. Me.

This is what you can. 

Laugh. Smile. Beautiful smile. 

Silence. S-I-L-E-N-C-E! 

Broken.

Write. I want you to write. 

I write. No regrets. 

I write. For you I write. 

Write. For me. For you. For us. Us? 

Yes. No. Perhaps?

Perhaps. Perhaps. Perhaps.

Side effects are temp. 

Sick? are you sick?

Side effects, need time. 

Time. 

Do you believe in time? 

Intentions. No. 

Does time stop? 

I want to play. Magic stick. Now and then, everywhere. 

Can we play with time?

Time heals. No. 

Time buries. No? 

Sorry. Beautiful soul. 

Hurt soul. Sorry. 

You. 

You aching soul, be strong. 

Or whatever...

One thousand nights to go.

Every night, when the darkness is about to kiss the light, I abandon.
Every night, when the cockerel is about to crow in the break of dawn, I torture.
Every night, when the sun is about to wake up for a good morning ray, I kill.

Every night, I live to feed my ego.
Every night, I live to fulfill my passions.
Every night, I live to abandon, to torture and to kill.

Every night I am no one.
I am Shahryar! Shahryar!

Tonight you came, with your story to tell.
Tonight you came, for my imagination to conquer.
Tonight you came, and it was my turn to taste lust and despair.

You smile, you laugh, you lie, you touch...and I die.

Preternatural...storyteller...a fairy you are.
One thousand nights to go, and I didn't know.
That I am Shahryar, and Shahrazad you are.

A fighter...

So you tell me to write.
"Write for me", you say.

You challenge me. 

You tease me. 

You test me.

It is not right, I am not going to write. 

I insist, I am not going to write!

"You are a fighter, you should not surrender". You smile.

"I was born a leader" I shout. I fight. I resist!

Lost in the brightness of your pearl teeth and the rose of your soft lips...

I surrender...

You are right. I am no leader.
I am a fighter, I refuse no command.

So, I write. 

I write for you. 

I am a fighter, I refuse no command.

Bang Bang!

"Bang bang, he shot me down
Bang bang, I hit the ground
Bang bang, that awful sound"

Unclosed circles, old stories, nostalgia, love, pain, happiness, sadness, it all hit you at once, with no warning. With no preparation, with no mercy.


You just see it coming straight towards you, in front of your eyes and you are helpless. Your life, your history, people that you loved, people that hurt you, people that you hurt. Bang bang, and you find yourself on the ground, naked, exposed, betrayed and...loved.


Mixed feelings of love and hate. No, I refuse to hate. Mixed feelings of love and disappointment. A bit of sadness, yet happiness for I feel, for It is revealed. 


Happiness for honesty being shared, for scared soul choosing to do it the right way. I smile, and I laugh with pain, because I choose to. I choose to keep it simple, to comprehend, to absorb as much as possible, to feel it all, with all my body, organ by organ. I choose to keep the drama outside my system. I try, but I am overwhelmed. I look for a place to pour, to shed a tear, but I have no tears. 

Inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale.

Bang bang, I hit the ground, and I stand up. 
Bang bang, I hear this awful sound, and I shut my ears.


Bang bang, I see your face. I see your face.
Bang bang, you don't mean to hurt. You don't mean to hurt.
Bang bang, I like your soul.

Bang bang.